On the beginning of the year I was shocked because suddenly I have to be bridesmaid not just for one wedding of my friend but there are 3 more to go. Yeah, all of my best friend from high school are also getting married this year, can you imagine that? I was so surprised that they were proposed by the end of the year last year then suddenly one by one all of them are informing their wedding dates. I was already attending wedding almost every month starting last year but what shocking me is that I have to be the bridesmaid four time this year, it just that I am so happy for them but at the same time feeling insecure because of their "settled" life coming ahead.
I know that everyone have their own time zone in their life, that they will arrive times when you are getting married and have a job and have a family and wonderful life and so forth. It just that maybe next year everything would change. My friend would not single anymore and they might be pregnant or having babies and talking about the price of the milk and stuff while I'm still looking for a decent guy to come and propose me lol, and pursuing my career as a doctor with endless examination to do first.
They say at your quarter age people should worry about the intimate relationship and stability of career in which both of them are things that distract me. I felt so stupid on being so weak this past year and forgetting about the bigger future a hold on me that I should continue to pursue. I am worried to be like everyone else and yet I forgot that if I become like what everyone else did like married now and forgot about my dream and so on, and just like that would make me no special at all. I forgot to being me. That strong independent women who eager to try something new, who always curious about new knowledge, who criticise everything that runs differently, who can be strong toward temptation. I have to find my way back as my friend said "You should go for it, Nadya!"
When I look back I said to my self and realize, you'll be regret on time you spend on thinking of things that is not deserved to have your attention and distract you. You should keep on going. Don't let anything go in your way. Find your way back.
In strugling to recover my thought about planning on my future.
-NA
I know that everyone have their own time zone in their life, that they will arrive times when you are getting married and have a job and have a family and wonderful life and so forth. It just that maybe next year everything would change. My friend would not single anymore and they might be pregnant or having babies and talking about the price of the milk and stuff while I'm still looking for a decent guy to come and propose me lol, and pursuing my career as a doctor with endless examination to do first.
They say at your quarter age people should worry about the intimate relationship and stability of career in which both of them are things that distract me. I felt so stupid on being so weak this past year and forgetting about the bigger future a hold on me that I should continue to pursue. I am worried to be like everyone else and yet I forgot that if I become like what everyone else did like married now and forgot about my dream and so on, and just like that would make me no special at all. I forgot to being me. That strong independent women who eager to try something new, who always curious about new knowledge, who criticise everything that runs differently, who can be strong toward temptation. I have to find my way back as my friend said "You should go for it, Nadya!"
When I look back I said to my self and realize, you'll be regret on time you spend on thinking of things that is not deserved to have your attention and distract you. You should keep on going. Don't let anything go in your way. Find your way back.
In strugling to recover my thought about planning on my future.
-NA
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