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I only want to be listened...

When you feel down, you just need someone to talk to and you only want them to listen to you, you don't really want to hear their story and get any comment from them about your story too. Because for girls, taking all it out is more important than finding a solution it self, don't you agree ladies?

Well whenever I feel lonely and got faraway from home and miss them I actually just wanna talk to them and to be welcomed nicely and calmly. But what I got that she only concern about herself what's going on inside the house, yelling, complaining about the day and people who works with her ignorantly but what I need actually only an ear to listen, I am tired enough of what I had all day here and I just want to hear a great story of the day and a warm welcome in the telephone. Guess what makes me worry too much all day long, because they always made me in hurry, cannot calm down with the situation and blow small things up as it is really matters. In which what I learned from people that we can take a deep breath and finish everything calmly without worries and yelling. I am just sick of it. She may think that she doesn't seem mad but what it heard, the voice, you can tell that it's yelling or else I might ignore it since I've lived whole my life with her but it just despite you know that it is just the way she express her feeling, it can still hurt your feeling.

When I ask this and that I honestly just want her to understand that I miss her even though I don't know how to express it because both of us hold our pride greatly and not showing to each other, and I just want her to be more aware of it, "peka" sensitive a little bit. I didn't got to come home and eat all of the fancy food in Eid al Adha, that's why I seek for my pleasure on my own, even though it cost a lot (I tried out new Korean BBQ Restaurant in town, although it is overpriced and slightly not kind of worth it) but I'm still grateful that I still have friends who want to share together so we ate food that they brought from home together, rendang and semur, it taste wonderful! What I miss is just Kebuli Rice and Fried Lamb though :(

And that's why I always seek for activities that can make me occupied so my mind don't wandering around like this (although I actually in the middle of researching for amsa mun position paper though), because I haven't meet a great companion to share my life stories with. I once fall in love, and hoping that it would happen again sooner maybe? haha. People said that when you fall in love you feel happy and passionate. Well I guess I need that to be motivated. So well then at least I also got somebody to talk to and only listened without interruption :))

Well back to work, Gotta challenge my self to do MUN and try SIMPIC selection, and do more research, hopefully in NRPC and SCRIPTA. Haha well I like to use abbreviation for all those thing so it seems more private. Anyway just a crappy thought of me :(

Lately, Happy IED MUBARAQ EVERYONE! :))


-NA

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